I gave her work when she needs one, Saleh fixed her motor when she have no transport to go to work, I gave her money when she needs it and came over her house once in while to check up on her when I was near. While she did the opposite of these.
Blaming me for not caring for my family...when she is never being home for more than a week in the last 5 years. Just being in a while then head back to the secluded hole. Claiming understanding parents more than I have. I can say I held mak's secret more than she knows...which in the end she knew from me. I have weaknesses...I am not perfect. I learnt from others that quarrel between mother and child is normal. They have their own misunderstanding, but why is it that all of sudden you came in gushing out 5 years worth of stories blaming I do not care for family. Where was she all this while? Mak even claimed that it is hard to get hold onto her for the past years. All sudden she decided to stay in Melaka saying I don't care of the family and that if I get married my own family may not last. That is below the belt.
I am not closed with Abah...so I don't go pouring my heart out to him. I do it in diplomatic formal way. Is it wrong? Why claimed that I hate him? You claimed that while taking his money monthly for years and not forgetting mak's money too and spent it on boyfriend? Is that loyalty? At least I refused to take Abah's money because I know money is scarce on him and he values it more than I do. I even suggested him to give my part that I did not take to my sister! And she is still getting allowances...still can't stand up on her own and claimed that I burden my parents.
I am not perfect and I still sometimes argue with mak...but I still want to stay by her side and get really sad when I dissappoint her. I did wrong things but I want to change. I believe that anything that fall on me is fated by God to remind me not to stray too far away.
